The Prophet by Khalil Gibran

So, once upon a time I read The Shack, and I hated it. (See also that other writer of questionable Christian silliness: Mandino, Og.) Also once upon a time, I read The Alchemist and I hated it. And ALSO once upon a time, I read The Devil and Miss Prym because I like to give a guy a second chance, and I hated it and decided that if I were ever forced into a TO THE DEATH cage match, I would challenge Paulo Coelho because EVEN IF I DIED at least I'd get to punch that guy in the face.

The obvious theme here is that I don't dig "inspirational" literature. As you all know, my number one literary pet peeve is being preached at (WRITE AN ESSAY FOR GOD'S SAKE) so what possesses me to ever pick up a book that EXISTS FOR THAT PURPOSE I will never know. I think it's because I wanted to go back to the source. I was curious about the fountainhead of all inspirational/spiritual fiction: Gibran's The Prophet. The book at whose altar Deepak Chopra probably makes daily ablutions. That's right people. Gibran was your spiritual guru before being a guru was a million dollar enterprise.

So basically, The Prophet is about a prophet. He lives in a city and decides he's going to peace out because prophets? They're a traveling band. Just before he peaces out, all the Townsfolk are like, yo. Tell us about some shit. So he does. The beginning of each chapter features a new Townsfolk saying something like, "Tell us about clothes (no I'm not joking, really, tell us the spiritual aspect of clothing)," or law, or crime, or beauty (which The Prophet is a BIG FAN OF, obvs- you can't be a guru without loving the trees and flowers and ugly people, etc.), or death, or whatever. And it's all very deep and flowery and Oprah would love it.

 

DUDES. Let's be clear. My blleeerrgghness about this has little to do with the literary merit and everything to do with my personal preference (hating inspirational psuedo-lit) and the style. It also irritates my pre-existing spiritual sitch because it has a lot of Biblical stuff going on, except Gibran does things like quote the Bible and then contradict what he just said by watering it down a good bit, generally with a cute little literary flourish. I don't like literary flourishes, and since I'm pretty familiar with the Bible and it's No Nonsense, Generally Straightforward Proverbial Business, I'm more comfortable with that. So then I moved from I Don't Like How This is Written Because This Genre Makes Me Violent INTO Also I Think A Lot of What He Is Saying Is True But Also A Lot Of What He Is Saying Is Feel-Good Oprah-liscious Bullshit and the bullshit distracts me. 

So yeah. If you dig your literature with a heavy sidecar of Inspiration, and if reading what is basically a very hugtastic sermon is your jam, SPREAD THIS SHIT ON TOAST. However, if you're on the cynical side and think that anything that would be shelved next to anything by Ekhart Tolle (including Ekhart Tolle) is probably crap, approach this book with dread and fear. 

ONE STAR due to personal preference. You may love it.