Soooo it's Top Ten Tuesday over at The Broke and the Bookish, and this week I'm participating because the topic is: Top Ten Literary Characters You Find Most Dislikable. There's no lack of annoying (especially to me, who finds almost everything annoying, all the time) characters out there, so picking ten will be a bit of a stretch. Here we go:
1. Fanny from Mansfield Park. Someone buy this woman a margarita and some red panties. Oh, and backbone. That would be nice. I want to see Lizzie mud-wrestle Fanny. In fact, I want anyone to mud-wrestle Fanny. It's hard to want her to end up with her love interest because (heishercousingross) she is such a bleh.
2. Beloved from Beloved. Are you a ghost? Are you an escaped slave? Are you some crazy crack ho Oprah found on the side of the road? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN THIS BOOK?
3. Vronsky from Anna Karenina. This guy is totally metrosexual. He spends how many pages thinking about his teeth? In my book, he is less likeable than Anna because at least Anna succeeds in doing what they both should have done on page one.
4. Ashley from Gone With the Wind. Oh I love you Scarlet, no I can't love you Scarlet, but I love you Scarlet, but the SOUTH and my WIFE but you're so hot but would you like to hear another speech about how you're so hot but the SOUTH and my WIFE? No? TOO BAD! Blah blah blah..
5. Rosamond from Middlemarch. She's a middle class climber who is, actually, stupid. Stupid and selfish and systematically destroys her husband's soul so she can have nice china wear. I'm all for equal rights and whatnot, but this character literally cares about nothing but herself. And aforementioned china wear.
6. Amy March from Little Women. She's just a snot nosed little brat who needs a whipping, as my mother would say. And I would agree.
7. Lady Chatterley in Lady Chatterley's Lover. A woman gets bored because her wounded war hero husband is now paralyzed, so she can't get any. She then sleeps with the groundskeeper and tries to pretend like she loves him, when in reality, she just wants to get some. So basically, her entire life as a character consists of finding fulfillment through a man. OH and it's un-sexy.
8. Skimpole in Bleak House. A friend of one of the main characters who mooches off everyone to avoid debtor's prison, including poor wards of the state. He never works and proclaims it is because he is simply a child and can't be expected to take on any responsibility in life. He also has a wife and children, and drives one of the characters to his doom. He's pretty much evil disguised as innocence, but not in a smart/fun way.
9. Everyone in Wuthering Heights. It was really hard for me to finish this book. I went in expecting one of the greatest love stories ever, and what I got was a cast of bat-shit crazy weirdos, one of whom may or may not have some necrophiliac tendencies. I did like the maid, though. She was..sane.
10. Mrs. Danvers in Rebecca. She's the only real villain I have on here, because for the most part, villains are at least interesting enough to make you care. But this lady is SO villainous and SO creepy, you just sort of hate her. Like visceral, punch-her-in-the-face hate her.
Sooo those are my least likable literary characters. I purposefully left off Holden because I've already spewed venom about his over-use of the word "phony." At any rate, I'm almost done with Swann's Way AND Shakespeare's Sonnets. I WILL review the sonnets, because I'm an audacious little ninny.
Anyway, do you love these characters? Have I stepped on your heart's toes? Do tell.